自源自语

This is the famous UM lake, where ppl come to jog everyday! After a very long time, I put my sport shoes back on and go for a jog. It has been a while I jog like this, 30 minutes non stop. Thinking back, during secondary school time, was my climax time. I can jog 10-20 laps on the field. After learning to swim, I rarely jog. Jogging is different from swimming. What I love about jogging is the feeling of the sweat after jogging. （汗流浃背的感觉）. Recently, I have been putting on weight. People have been reminding me over the fact that I am fatter than before.(esp at the face?!DAMN!!!) Maybe is because of the stress, eating out, no exercise, hypothyroid (seriously wanna get a T4/TSH done!)? or the retinoid? I think the eating and sedentary lifestyle are the 2 most important contributing factors! It is about time to re-start my old hobby-jogging. Lose weight! I can't accept that ppl keep telling me I am fatter! come on, FAT is the last word I wanna hear to describe ME! I have been thin since...

“应当一无挂虑，只要凡事藉著祷告、祈求，和感谢，将你们所要的告诉神。神所赐、出人意外的平安必在基督耶稣里保守你们的心怀意念。” 腓 4：6-7 这图是在几年前画的。是我最满意的作品之一。 把祷告，祈求，装在信封里。邮差把它寄给上帝。 多久没祷告了？我忘了。 好怀念画这个图的时候。做我喜欢做的东西。 还画得出酱的东西吗？ 多久没画了？我忘了。 神所赐、出人意外的平安必在基督耶稣里保守你们的心怀意念

我不是一定要你回来，只是当又把回忆翻开 想做乐观的人，每种雨声，听了都不冷 想要飞，却怎么样也飞不高 在我心上用力的开一枪，让这一切归零在这声巨响 要怎么负荷？舍不得，又无可奈何 别人说的话，随便听一听 容忍的人其实并不笨，只是宁可对自己残忍 想问天问大地，或者是迷信，问问宿命 这样并不算太坏，。。。说来无奈 我们都没错，只是不适合，我要的，我现在才懂得 陪我唱歌，清唱一首。。 哈哈。看得懂吗？

For those who has asked: R u ok? Well indeed I am not. How is it possible to be ok with this? I know I will be ok, because it will always get better in time, just that I don't know how long it wil take. Trying not to be negative yet I can't help it Thanks for asking, even though most of the time I don't know how to answer you. Thanks for not asking, because I can't tell you that I am not. "I don't wanna run away but I can't take it I don't understand"

What is more frustrating than letting yourself down? Will you ever change? What does it take for you to make the change? Have you tried? Have you tried hard enough? It pains me just thinking of it...

电台不断播着母亲节的歌：听妈妈的话，世上只有妈妈好，鲁滨花。。。 那个只有几gram 的手机，好像有千斤重，怎么拿起来打回去？打了要说些什么？ 很多事情，说得容易，做得难。 祝你母亲节快乐。 有些话，我说不出来。。。

是不是生日一定要唱这首歌？但是这个生日，没得唱。 (Internet 太慢了，没法上载mtv) 若我说不失望，是骗人的。 如你know me well enough, 我没什么非做不可的事情，这个是其中一个。 well,开始工作与学生时代，是不能相提并论的。 谁得空，爽不爽就去唱k? 谢谢你们的陪伴。虽然不是唱 k, 但是 I still appreciate it. 疯狂的shopping, 买了又一双的hush puppies (一年内，我买了四双rm300++/pairs 的鞋)。还有，买了我很久就想买的padini 的 necktie. 生日愿望，没什么特别。长越大，发现，许给自己的愿望越来越少。 身边的人，希望他们一切安好。短短一年，一些事情，一些人。。。我希望你们好好照顾自己。